Last month of 2023.

So far, I have travelled in time, on time, and through time.

I long for more moments of being out of time.

Futurists, foresight practitioners, and futures thinkers reflect on the concept of Temporal Exhaustion when societies suffer from short-termism. The sociologist Elise Boulding (1978) is often quoted in explaining this dire situation: "If one is mentally out of breath all the time from dealing with the present, there is no energy left for imagining the future."

This essay redefines the concept of Temporal Exhaustion as an inevitable condition that arises from an unhealthy relationship with the Now. In fact, a proper connection to the Present will encourage receptiveness to Future/s. The state of Future-Presence is introduced: Now is elongated to embrace a long tomorrow. This is achieved through Temporal Awakening: a realization that time is an illusory concept in the infinite game of life.

2022. New year. My ears are still bombarded with litanies of change.

I would love to resurrect Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr. His uvula shall scream, once and for all, the French words that he penned: plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose.

The more things change, the more they stay the same!

I had a burning ambition to be an Erasmus Mundus scholar. My laser focus aimed at 2021 as the year of receiving the prestigious acceptance letter. I should obtain it by the age of 25 years old: that is how my prideful assiduousness wanted to take the spotlight.

I love paradox. We normally invent words that differentiate ideas, but paradoxes unify the opposites to describe one reality. It is grounded on integration, not on delineation. It always begs the question: can the polar opposites be unified?

My strategy has always been trying to figure things out by constantly moving/taking an action. A paragon of restlessness and perfectionism, I surely am.

And I just discovered that it does not work… So, it is time for an improv!

I have always been intrigued, fascinated, and engrossed with the concept of time – only to realize that my understanding of it is flat-out incorrect. (I was naked dressed in pride: I kept on swatting a playful mosquito with both of my hands, but it continuously eluded me.)

Time is not actually linear: there is no beginning and end. The past is not yet finished, the present extends beyond now, and the future is not far away. Everything is happening everywhere all the time. All realities are existing all at once.

Whenever I take a photo, who am I is inextricably intertwined with where am I, and with when am I.

This year, I have finally learned how to define myself properly.

I do not mean to write with a condescending sense of egotism; in fact, this is about how I learned to transcend "me, myself, and I" as I delved deeper to the reality of my existence. I unexpectedly found the answer when I took the pursuit of true happiness seriously.

Words cannot fully represent the truth of the experience, but it can still point to the wisdom that is meant to be shared. Everyone deserves this profound sense of peace, albeit challenging to sustain.

Real talk: I spent 16 years studying in private academic institutions, but I only graduated with much cluelessness on what to do next. Diligence in schoolwork was only recognized with certificates and medals that blatantly lack meaning and purpose; these alone cannot make me stay alive.

In all those laborious years, I was rarely given an option to stay still. Even if I was taught to be inquisitive, grades in report cards are not okay with not knowing. I was not awarded with a lot of space to deepen my understanding of life.